Moteriktig ordliste for alternativ kunnskap.

Og nå noe fra arkivet. Fra den tiden jeg fulgte nettsiden Butterflies and Wheels, som ble opprettet for å yte motstand mot 3 ufyselige trender i dagens samfunn – oppsummert slik i deres egne ord:

  1. Pseudoscience that is ideologically and politically motivated.
  2. Epistemic relativism in the humanities (for example, the idea that statements are only true or false relative to particular cultures, discourses or language-games).
  3. Those disciplines or schools of thought whose truth claims are prompted by the political, ideological and moral commitments of their adherents, and the general tendency to judge the veracity of claims about the world in terms of such commitments.

Kampen ble delvis ført med humor, og redaksjonen laget bl.a. en egen – meget satirisk – ordliste for tilhengere av «alternativ kunnskap». Her følger noen av de vittige definisjonene:

Acceptance
Nice, warm, cooperative way of evaluating ideas, much better than argument.

Alternative
A wonderful thing. Because it’s the opposite of everything. You have the regular, normal, boring thing, like medicine, or scholarship, or education, and then you have the alternative kind, which does whatever the opposite is. Normal medicine relies on testing, so dear alternative medicine relies on guesswork and hunches and an inner voice. So much more spiritual.

Argument
Unpleasant, testosterone-driven method of supporting one’s assertions, to be avoided in favour of acceptance.

Aristotle
A famous thief. Stole all his ideas from the library at Alexandria, built after his death, which just goes to show how sneaky he was.

Binary
Terrible, dreadful, shocking word for a truly appalling way to think. Makes everything separate. That must not be. We are all One. Everything is One.

Defensive
Adjective for someone who insists on disagreeing with me, and goes on disagreeing even after I’ve said how right I am.

Demonising
Sharply criticising something that I approve of.

E=MC2
Probably a sexed equation, the product of a male obssession with speed.

Education
Brutal, violent intrusion of arbitrary material into the clean innocent heads of children, which should be left empty.

Enlightenment
Sinister, destructive period of history which had a ‘project’ to dominate nature, prefer reason to superstition, and stop going to church. All a big mistake, but postmodernism will fix it.

Fashion
Important ethical principle. Something that is behind the times is very wrong indeed.

Gut
A good part of the body to think with, but not the best. See heart.

Ideology
Ideas we don’t agree with. Probably exploitative.

Linear thinking
Unfortunate, controlling, impoverished, male variety of thinking that’s all hung up on logic, evidence, chronology, causation, and pedantic in-the-head stuff like that.

Measurement
Tedious, pedantic activity engaged in by scientists because they have nothing better to do. They need to get a life.

Opinion
Everything. Often confused, by prepostmodern people, with entities like truth, reality, the world. «That’s just your opinion,» is the approved rebuke in such cases.

Positivism
The insane, harmful, elitist idea that one should have some evidence before deciding something is true (see empiricism).

Religion
1. Organised religion not all that good, oppressive and, well, organised, except of course when it’s other people’s organised religion, in the Third World and so on, and Third World people in the First World, or is that the right thing to call them, anyway I’m spiritual rather than religious, but it’s all the same thing really, and we’re all One.
2. Another word for science.

Self-esteem
What children go to school to learn. The curriculum.

Thinking
A suspect and risky activity. The Nazis had a saying, ‘to think is already to doubt.’ It’s a shame it was the Nazis who said it, because it is so true.

Tolerance
Believing whatever I say, with no questions asked.

Truth
A quaint, old-fashioned word, like bustle or barouche-landau or button-hook. No longer needed.